


Headcanon ask: Hardy & Hannah

by LadyPaigeC



Series: Tumblr Headcanon Ask Game [5]
Category: Broadchurch, Secret Diary of a Call Girl (TV)
Genre: F/M, Headcanon, Tumblr Memes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-25
Updated: 2019-07-25
Packaged: 2020-07-19 18:22:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,894
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19978480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyPaigeC/pseuds/LadyPaigeC
Summary: My responses to "send me a ship and I'll tell you who..." (Hardy and Hannah edition)





	Headcanon ask: Hardy & Hannah

**Author's Note:**

  * For [gingerteaandsympathy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gingerteaandsympathy/gifts).



• **who hogs the duvet** \- This has a two part answer. When they first get together, and Hardy is at the stage of the relationship where he is too afraid to fart in bed for fear of scaring her off and he honestly cannot believe that Hannah is even in his bed, then it is Hannah who hogs the covers. He lays so still and anxious and praying that he won’t have another heart attack because Hannah Fucking Baxter is laying next to him. The longer they are together and the more comfortable he becomes in their relationship, the more easily sleep comes to him. Until finally one day, he’s like a freakin’ snoring log, and he wraps himself up in the blankets and poor Hannah hasn’t got a chance at recovering any of them. She just shrugs though and cuddles into his back to keep warm.  
• **who texts/rings to check how their day is going** \- Look, Hardy would forget his head if it wasn’t attached to his body, especially when he is deep in an investigation. Hannah understands though and send him emojis and silly little texts throughout the day and a reminder to eat lunch. Hardy pretends to be annoyed, but he secretly loves it.  
• **who’s the most creative when it comes to gifts** \- Hannah has a natural affinity for just finding the right gift for the right person for the right occasion. She doesn’t spend a lot of time thinking about it, but it’s always perfect. Hardy spends more time worrying and debating and really, really tries to be creative. More often than not he puts off buying things until the very last minute because he just cannot decide and then he scrambles to find an open shop and ultimately shows up with wine, flowers, chocolates, and a sheepish expression. Though, there was that one time he surprised Hannah with a trip to the Maldives that completely caught her off guard. (He noticed a pink bikini in her things, asked Miller the next morning where she thought a romantic beach destination might be, and voilà, one of the easiest…most romantic gifts of his life.)  
• **who gets up first in the morning** \- Hardy. He often goes into work early and Hannah likes to snuggle in the warm spot he leaves behind.  
• **who suggests new things in bed** \- Hannah. There is literally no other way to answer this question.  
• **who cries at movies** \- Hardy. He is a soft boi wrapped in a prickly exterior. Give him Judy Hopps pinning a badge onto new police academy graduate, Nick Wilde, and he’s a blubbering mess.  
• **who gives unprompted massages** \- At the beginning of their relationship, it was always Hannah. She’s sensuous and tactile. But over time, Hardy grows used to the touching and being touched in return and eventually he can give as good as he gets.  
• **who fusses over the other when they’re sick** \- Bless Hardy, he tries. Hannah is not a good patient. Let’s be real though, he isn't either - the only difference is that Hannah doesn’t put up with his shit. “You don’t want the soup I heated up, fine. Die for all I care!” (She cares and he eats the soup.) Hannah, on the other hand, threw the mug of tea he brought her after finding out he microwaved it. She apologized, but he did always use the kettle to make her tea going forward.  
• **who gets jealous easiest** \- Hardy is a always in a constant state of quiet jealousy. It takes a very long time and a lot of shagging to get him to a point where he isn’t afraid she is going to leave him. So, he does a lot of grin and baring it. He draws the line at someone touching her though. The first time that happens and he pushed someone up against a wall for groping her without her consent, she is so turned on, she drags him from the bar to the loo and fucks him (or lets him fuck her) against the door to the ladies.  
• **who has the most embarrassing taste in music** \- Hannah. She listens to anything and everything. She sings off key and dances like a dork to make Hardy laugh. But she also has the best taste in music, and often uses it to set the mood at home.  
• **who collects something unusual** \- Hannah. Have you seen her collection of sex toys? And while she may have gotten rid of a lot of things when they moved in together, her collection is still VERY extensive.  
• **who takes the longest to get ready** \- Have you met Hardy? Have you seen how he dresses? Okay, to be fair it used to take him a long time to _decide_ what to wear when he was trying to impress Hannah at the beginning of their relationship. It didn’t take him very long to shower, shave and dress though. Hannah, on the other hand, has a routine™ that she keeps to almost every day. It is designed to slay, and slay she does.  
• **who is the most tidy and organized** \- Hannah, it’s a throwback to when she needed to keep Hannah and Belle separate. She had a lot of personal rules for herself, and while many have been relaxed, that energy still comes out in how she keeps her things.  
• **who gets most excited about the holidays** \- Hardy dreads the holidays because it almost always means more work for him. Inevitably some idiot does something stupid after over-indulging in eggnog and his time with his family is cut short. He does love having Daisy visit though. Hannah loves getting to spend the time with Alec and Daisy, but dreads having to visit her own family. If her mother doesn’t stop asking when she and Alec are going to have children of their own, she might just scream.  
• **who is the big spoon/little spoon** \- At the beginning of the night, Alec starts off as the big spoon, but at some point during the night, they switch, and Alec wakes up most mornings with Hannah’s breasts pressed up against his back.  
• **who gets most competitive when playing games and/or sports** \- Hardy doesn’t like to lose, either at work or at play, but he was unprepared for how all in Hannah goes when she decides she is going to win at something. It is easiest to just get out of her way.  
• **who starts the most arguments** \- Hannah is very opinionated and isn’t afraid to tell Hardy when he’s being a pillock. Though when he is being particularly hard-headed, her favorite insult to lob at him is, “Miller is right, you are a knob!” After he has a chance to cool down, he reflects on what he’s done and will apologize if she has a point. If he stands by his actions, he usually ends up yelling at her as to why he acted like a knob (usually its because he loves his daughter or his friends or her) and then she throws herself at him and they have angry sex or make-up sex and by the time they’re done, neither remembers that they even had an argument.  
• **who suggests that they buy a pet** \- Hardy thinks that Hannah might like the company during the day, so he suggests it, but Hannah really doesn’t want the responsibility of making sure an animal stays alive. She’s perfectly happy to flit about town as the desire strikes her or to go to the beach or when she’s missing Alec something fierce break out the sex toys and take naughty pictures which she send to his mobile.  
• **what couple traditions they have** \- they are a non-traditional couple and as such don’t put much stock in things that other couples might find important. Hardy tries to get home from work early on their anniversary, but it doesn’t always happen and it’s not a big deal to either of them. He will take her out for a nice dinner to celebrate, though sometimes it’s a week after the fact. Hannah tries to keep their sex life spicy and Hardy will go along with almost anything she throws at him. If she want to be blindfolded and have hot wax dripped on her, count him in. If she wants to play with handcuffs and riding crops and vibrators, well, ok if it makes her happy. If she gets drunk one night and orders a strap-on because “it’s hilarious, Alec,” he’ll let her peg him as long as Daisy’s not visiting at the time. And actually, he finds he enjoys it more than he expected he would, so she reserves it for use on special occasions. He comes to the realization that all those things he thought he was doing for her, she was doing for him, and so it really was all about them. And they are stronger for it.  
• **what tv shows they watch together** \- Alec hates TV. He hates the news, he hates reporters, he thinks those singing shows are shite. But the minute that he finds out Hannah’s book is being made into a TV show, he's mentally rearranging his schedule so that he is always home to watch it with her.  
• **what other couple they hang out with** \- Miller and this bloke that Hannah introduced her to - he’s a screenwriter on her new show - divorced with two little mites of his own; also, Bambi and Byron come to visit twice a year.  
• **how they spend time together as a couple** \- they do a lot of cuddling at home and shagging. They stroll along the river behind their chalet and sneak snogs along the way. They go to Miller’s for dinner and backyard bbqs in the summer. They go dancing, though Hardy hates it, Hannah can usually get him to at least join her on the dance floor for a few songs (as long as they’re slow and he can hold her close). Hannah adores going to wine and painting events, she can’t paint worth a damn and usually gives up on the still life before she finishes her first glass. There was that one time she decided straight away to paint Hardy in the buff, the instructor was scandalized by how large she’s made his cock (Hannah insists it’s to scale, Hardy refuses to discuss it). She hung it over their bed.  
• **who made the first move** \- Hannah. Hardy nearly passed out when they first spoke. Ok, he may have been having a cardiac event, but Hannah got him to hospital, pretended to be his wife, and then when he gained consciousness berated him for not taking care of himself which in turn scared the bejesus out of her as he collapse in front of her. In the end, he decided staying under the care of the doctor was better than checking himself out and having to deal with an angry Hannah. But as you can see, it all turned out all right for Alec.  
• **who brings flowers home** \- Alec is the king of flowers (and wine and chocolate). Hannah never lets him live it down after Miller told her that story. But she still shags him silly whenever he comes home with them for her.  
• **who is the best cook** \- Hannah. She tries and can usually follow a recipe. Alec thought microwaving tea was acceptable behavior!!


End file.
